What Does Your Pastor Really Want From You?

designPastors can be pretty demanding. They want us to come to church every time the doors are open, pay our tithes and then also give in offerings, volunteer to teach Sunday School and serve at work days, invite our neighbors to church and then pray for the church an hour per day! How unrealistic is that?!

Seriously, Pastors only want what God wants for their church members. Most Pastors I know love their congregation with a “shepherd’s love.” They pray diligently for their flock. They do their best to feed them and keep them spiritually healthy. But Pastors do have hopes for the people they lead.

  • Pastors want their church members to be disciples of Christ. We are all called to make disciples of other people (Matthew 28:19-20). Any pastor who is doing their job will teach and train, develop and challenge. Sometimes they come across as pushy, but it helps to understand their motives.
  • Pastors want their church members to grow spiritually. Preachers have the responsibility of feeding those to whom they preach. While personal growth is the responsibility of every individual, pastors want to see their members mature in their faith.
  • Pastors want their church members to spiritually reproduce. It has been said, “sheep beget sheep.” Good pastors train the members to do the work of the ministry (Ephesians 4:11-13). You will make your pastor rejoice if you become a soul winner!
  • Pastors want their church members to discover and utilize their spiritual gifts. Good church members don’t just sit in the pew. They understand that they are called by God to fulfill a ministry. If you function in your gift, you will be a great blessing to your church and pastor.
  • Pastors want their church members to experience the joy and fulfillment of being a vital part of a vibrant and growing church. A few church members prefer a small church but most people know that healthy things grow. Let’s embrace church as a dynamic and progressing organism, made alive by the Holy Spirit!

Pastors don’t intentionally use people to get what they want. At times, it may feel like members are only a means to an end – the way that the pastor can build a successful ministry. But true Pastors want only what is best; they only want what God wants for the people they serve.

When your pastor encourages you to attend church, serve and give, he or she is doing so out of a heart of love for you and a desire for your spiritual well being. Pray for your pastor because they have a difficult task. But also pray for your pastors so that they can lead the church with integrity of heart and skillful hands (Psalms 78:72).

Now, make your Pastor’s day: Do the five things listed above and watch your pastor rejoice!

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10 Things You Did Not Learn In Seminary

designThere are things about ministry that can only be learned through experience. There are things about ministry that will only be learned through formal education. We need both!

While we treasure our educational opportunities, it is not reasonable to expect a few years at an academic institution to prepare us for a lifetime of ministry. We must be lifelong learners.

Listed below, in no particular order, are a few observations regarding things that hands-on ministry will teach you. You are better to learn these things now before you learn them in the “school of hard knocks.”

  • Ministry is hard and it gets harder all the time.
  • The certainty of the “ministry crucible.”
  • That most people are a joy with whom to work.
  • That you need 10 encouragements for every one discouragement.
  • Preaching is vitally important, but it may not be the most important aspect of ministry.
  • That emotional intelligence is one of your greatest assets; in fact, you will fail without it.
  • That one of the most important things a minister can say is, “I was wrong, I am sorry.” Apologize quickly, sincerely, and often.
  • As a pastor, your heart is revealed more by your prayer than by your preaching.
  • The skill of leading change is a non negotiable.
  • Avoid the trap of dividing your church with politics.
  • The responsible use of social media.
  • The absolute necessity of cultural diversity in ministry.
  • How important it is to stay in good physical condition.
  • How important a retirement plan is.
  • If you don’t observe Sabbath, you are a sinner!

If you are counting, you realize I have 15 items on the list. Perhaps it is akin to the preacher who thinks he preached for 30 minutes when he actually preached for 1 hour. So, number 16 might be: Learn how to count and to tell time. Your word matters.


How Should Christians Expect to be Treated?

designPerhaps some modern Believers have misguided expectations regarding how we will be treated in today’s culture. We seem to get very frustrated and even defensive when others do not respect our opinions. We get offended and become defensive of our beliefs, our rights and our convictions. Some of us are quick to fight to preserve what we believe we deserve. A few even think that we deserve honor because of our faith.

In times past, many Believers had a different expectation. Their response to opposition and resistance didn’t involve protests, boycotts or public outrage. Opposition and persecution were considered the norm for Christians.

Teresa of Avila wrote to the Lord, “Since worldly people have so little respect for You, what can we expect them to have for us? Can it be that we deserve that they should treat us any better than they have treated You? Have we done more for them than You have done that they should be friendly to us?

Apparently our forefathers and foremothers had no concept that they should demand fair and equitable, perhaps even favorable treatment by their contemporaries.

Recall, Jesus tells us, “whoever rejects you rejects me.” (Luke 10:16) Perhaps it would be healthy for us to not expect to be honored, but rather to be rejected for the cause of Christ. In fact, if the world accepts and honors us, could it be because we have distanced ourselves from Christ to the point that the world no longer sees Him in us?

Modern Christian, embrace the very strong teaching of our Brother, James. “You adulterers! Don’t you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God.” Truly, we are placed on earth to lead others to Christ, and that mission necessitates love. But in that process, we cannot love the world more than we love our Lord. And if the world holds us in positions of honor, perhaps it is because we have become friends with the world.

Let’s consider changing our expectations. If we live holy lives, the world is not our home and we shouldn’t get too comfortable here. We should expect to be uncomfortable for the cause of Christ. The moment we begin to demand our rights or rise up to defend our honor or fight for what we think we deserve, we have accepted this world as our domain. I don’t think that is what Christ expects for us.


Can you Play the Theme Song from Charlie Brown?

Several years ago, I knew a guy who could play the song on the piano, and he could play it very well. At many church social events, he would find his way to a nearby piano and begin to play the song. People would stop and listen and laugh along and talk about how awesome he was. He kept doing this for a while, until people got used to it.

This happy little song brings about warm feelings for many. They think of holidays as a kid. The title of the song is “Linus and Lucy” and it was released in 1964 by jazz pianist, Vince Guaraldi. I’m guessing the song will stay in your head the rest of the day.

At one event, I talked to the guy at our church about his remarkable talent to play the piano. And he told me something unusual. This was the only song he knew how to play. He never took lessons, he didn’t study music. He explained that, as a kid, he spent a lot of time alone. His parents had a piano, so he taught himself how to play that song – only that song. So, apart from the occasional show off session at church social functions, his talent was useless. It served no productive purpose. In addition to being really unusual, it always seemed like such a waste to me. Obviously he had some natural ability. If he had honed those skills and invested his time and energy in something in addition to that one song, who knows what he could’ve done?

Many leaders are “one song leaders.” They have one skill; one talent. Maybe they can sing well or preach powerfully or perhaps they are a good-looking person with a magnetic personality. They ride this talent as often and as far as they can. But much like the guy who could play only one song, they are limited in their effectiveness because they never develop anything more than their “go to” skill. They are able to put on a show, and initially attract a crowd, but eventually people get used to the same old offering and begin to ignore him or her.

Here is the sad part. That guy kept playing that song although people were no longer impressed. This was the only way he knew to get attention, and it no longer worked. I wonder how many of us are still doing the same thing that used to work – but it no longer works? Listen, sometimes, what was effective 10 years ago may no longer be effective today. That is why good leaders grow. They develop new abilities. They are smart enough to recognize when the same old song isn’t cutting it anymore.

Leaders, this is no time for pride or stubbornness. If what you are doing is not working, you need to adjust. If you find fewer people willing to follow, learn a new song. Even better, learn how to “play the piano”, not just one song.


Who Should Be A Pastor? (10 things a pastor must be able to do)

There are a few jokes about the perfect pastor that continue to make the rounds:

35 years old with 30 years experience.

Doesn’t dress too flashy or too trashy.

Has a lovely but modest wife, and 1.5 well-behaved children.

Can preach, teach, sing, play, administrate, cut grass, clean toilets, visit all the sick and elderly, attend all the church kids school plays and ball games and find time to pray for 3 hours every day.

These are jokes.

But it’s not funny when we see a person trying to serve as a pastor when they lack some basic necessary gifts and abilities.

From my 30 plus years in ministry, I have a few (10 for now) indispensable skills a successful pastor must possess. Please, let’s take some for granted. In other words, don’t scold me for omitting praying or whatever. These things are obvious. The points I want to cover may not be as obvious.

1. Must be able to personally lead someone to Christ. It is shocking to learn that some pastors have never led anyone to salvation outside of a church service. If the pastor doesn’t, the people won’t.

2. Must be able and willing, even eager, to work hard. Sometimes the work is manual, sometimes it is intellectual, but it is always strenuous. In my opinion, pastors cannot work less than 50 hours per week on average if they hope to build a growing, effective church. While we must prioritize our family and health, excessive television, golf, napping or any other “recreation” is a sign of slothfulness. Please don’t be guilty of adding to the “lazy preacher” perception. Of course the above numbers are considering full time pastors.

3. Must be humble. Arrogance, pride and an inflated ego by a pastor will destroy a ministry quickly. Get over yourself.

4. Must be a learner. Whether the education is formal or informal, there is no space for intellectual anemia. You never know it all so learn until you die. You speak on behalf of God; know what you’re talking about.

5. Must not be a racist. Now, this should be a given, but it is not. Pastors cannot discriminate against people of other races or nationalities. Mistreating anyone is not allowable. If you cannot love all people equally, and minister to anyone, you disqualify yourself from effective ministry, and perhaps Christianity altogether.

6. Must be compassionate. Some score higher on the mercy scale than others, but a hard-hearted pastor is an oxymoron. Shepherds must care.

7. Must value other generations. If you can only lead people who are close to your age, you have a very limited harvest field. If multigenerational ministry doesn’t come naturally to you, work on it. The long term effectiveness of your ministry is at stake.

8. Must not fall in love with methods, style or genres. If you simply must preach a certain way, or if you only allow a certain type of worship music, or if you insist that church ministry be conducted in your preferred method, perhaps there is an ownership problem. The ministry does not belong to you; the ministry belongs to the Lord. God never changes. But times change, people change, and what’s effective in ministry changes.

9. Must be accountable to and for others; must be responsible to and for others. Independent pastors (those who answer to no one) are operating outside of biblical guidelines. Followers should not follow this type of a leader.

10. Must be able to increase the impact of the church they serve. If a pastor cannot lead the church to grow, the church will die. A pastor that leads a church to die isn’t a good pastor.

Well, there is the list of 10. Of course, there are tons more, perhaps they will come in the future. In the meantime, pastor on!


On Mentoring

37641041_10156573501694214_6934824908186714112_nI’ve recently been considering how important it is for us to invest our knowledge, wisdom and experience in the next generation. I cannot overstate how important this concept is. If you are an adult and you have some semblance of a well-structured life, you OWE it to those coming behind you to impart what you know.

Specifically, I am considering Christian leaders. If you are a pastor of or a leader in a church, you simply must identify someone (or several people) to mentor. It is your spiritual responsibility to invest in those who will carry on the work once you are gone (and help you to carry it out right now).

I see a few necessary steps in this process:

Identify: Use your discernment. Observe behavior, attitudes, habits. When you sense that the Holy Spirit is calling a younger person into service – call them out!

Grace: Don’t look for the perfect candidate. No one is perfect. You must look with eyes toward redemption. The people you are observing are not yet fully developed. Part of your responsibility is to develop them.

Time: If you are too busy to spend time with younger folks, you are too busy. Farmers are not too busy to plant seeds.

Find your replacement: This is scary for some. But here is a news flash – you won’t live forever. If you leave your post and do not consider your replacement, you are negligent. And if you are intimidated that this person may take over before you are ready, well, you are already in serious trouble. Insecure leaders aren’t leaders.

They may leave you: Some do not invest in others because they don’t want to waste their time on someone who will leave. This is shortsighted and close-minded. If you train up a leader and they leave, your influence only grows.

Train but don’t dominate: Your responsibility is not to make a clone. Invest but allow freedom for your protégé to be their own person, their own leader.

Prepare to be disappointed: Some, perhaps several will abandon you. You cannot control the decisions of others. But neither can we fail to invest in others because of the decisions of some to depart.

Pursue: Don’t sit and wait for a young person to approach you, odds are they won’t. You are the leader – take the lead!

Expect them to go farther: When we invest, we expect growth. Our replacements had better be capable of taking the work farther than we ever could. When they succeed, celebrate! There is no room for jealousy – only celebration!

We simply must stop starting over. Too many of our key roles and positions are being left to the wind once the leader departs.

Two final thoughts: 1) Mentoring is a matter of spiritual stewardship. We have been given leadership gifts. God never gives us gifts so we can hoard them – He expects us to invest those gifts in others who will produce. 2) Paul sets the perfect example in II Timothy 2:2, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.” Share what you’ve been given with those who will share what they’ve been given.

Leader, I am challenging you. Regardless of your age, look back. Who is coming along behind? Please connect with them and bring them forward. The future of the Mission depends upon it. And if we fail to raise up the next leaders, we are culpable for its demise.


5 Quick (and Easy) Things You Can Do to Improve Your Leadership Skills

design1. Strategic Reading. No one who leads has a lot of extra time to read everything. And so much of what is available is redundant or shallow. Find your theme, do your research and read. Read less but read deep. Don’t try to retain everything or read too much, but read, and do so strategically.

2. Network with Similar Souls. You need to know you’re not alone. Isolation is dangerous. You need to be encouraged and you need to encourage another leader. Find a friend with whom you can commiserate. Make one another better.

3. Network with Someone who is Different. Don’t sleep with the enemy but find someone who opposes you, stands for the “other side” of things. Don’t argue; dialogue. Don’t seek to change them, seek to gain info, understand more deeply, and learn.

4. Commit to Grow (until you die). When you stop improving, you start failing. Keep learning new things; stay challenged. This requires humility and passion.

5. Serve someone. Don’t look for someone who can pay you back. Don’t serve to be seen. Find someone who doesn’t deserve it. Serve them. Keep quiet about it. Service is the core of leadership.

Ok, I misled you. I said in the title that these things are quick and easy. They are neither. In actuality, these things are hard, sometimes very hard. However, the more you practice them, the quicker and easier they will become. And the impact they will have on your leadership skills makes them well worth the effort. Put them into practice, you and those you lead will be glad you did.