Thoughts on Life and Leading

Once again, Proverbs has proven too much for me to handle. I just can’t cover all the verses that need to be covered. In the conclusion of Sage: Activating the Book of Proverbs, we are addressing chapters 18-31. After reading the chapters over and over, I believe there are 3 major topics – we are looking at:
1. Destructive Behaviors to Avoid, 2. Taking Care of the Needy, and 3. Getting Family Right.

Below are the scriptures that address each of the topics. You’ll see why I did not have the time in our worship events to cover them all:

1. Avoid Destructive Behavior (4 things that will destroy you)

Pride:
18:12 Pride leads to destruction; humility leads to honor. (CEV)
18:15 Wise men and women are always learning, always listening for fresh insights. (MSG)
21:4 Arrogance and pride—distinguishing marks in the wicked— are just plain sin. (MSG)
27:1-2 Don’t brag about tomorrow, since you don’t know what the day will bring. 2 Let someone else praise you, not your own mouth— a stranger, not your own lips. (NLT)
27:21 Gold and silver are tested in a red-hot furnace, but we are tested by praise. (CEV)
29:23 Pride will ruin people, but those who are humble will be honored. (NCV)

Laziness:
18:9 Being lazy is no different from being a troublemaker. (CEV)
19:15 Lazy people sleep a lot, and idle people will go hungry. (NCV)
20:4 If you are too lazy to plow, don’t expect a harvest. (CEV)
20:13 If you love sleep, you will end in poverty. Keep your eyes open, and there will be plenty to eat! (NLT)
21:25 Despite their desires, the lazy will come to ruin, for their hands refuse to work. (NLT)
22:13 The lazy person claims, “There’s a lion out there! If I go outside, I might be killed!” (NLT)
24:30-34 I once walked by the field and the vineyard of a lazy fool. 31Thorns and weeds were everywhere, and the stone wall had fallen down. 32When I saw this, it taught me a lesson: 33Sleep a little. Doze a little. Fold your hands and twiddle your thumbs. 34Suddenly poverty hits you and everything is gone! (CEV)
26:13-16 The lazy person claims, “There’s a lion on the road! Yes, I’m sure there’s a lion out there!” 14 As a door swings back and forth on its hinges, so the lazy person turns over in bed. 15 Lazy people take food in their hand but don’t even lift it to their mouth. 16 Lazy people consider themselves smarter than seven wise counselors. (NLT)
28:19 Work your garden—you’ll end up with plenty of food; play and party—you’ll end up with an empty plate. (MSG)

Alcohol:
20:1 Wine and beer make people loud and uncontrolled; it is not wise to get drunk on them (NCV)
23:29-35 Who has anguish? Who has sorrow? Who is always fighting? Who is always complaining? Who has unnecessary bruises? Who has bloodshot eyes? 30 It is the one who spends long hours in the taverns, trying out new drinks. 31 Don’t gaze at the wine, seeing how red it is, how it sparkles in the cup, how smoothly it goes down. 32 For in the end it bites like a poisonous snake; it stings like a viper. 33 You will see hallucinations, and you will say crazy things. 34 You will stagger like a sailor tossed at sea, clinging to a swaying mast. 35 And you will say, “They hit me, but I didn’t feel it. I didn’t even know it when they beat me up. When will I wake up so I can look for another drink?” (NLT)
31:4-7 Kings and leaders should not get drunk or even want to drink. 5Drinking makes you forget your responsibilities, and you mistreat the poor. 6Beer and wine are only for the dying or for those who have lost all hope. 7Let them drink and forget how poor and miserable they feel. (CEV)

Gossip:
18:7-8 The words of fools will ruin them; their own words will trap them. 8 The words of a gossip are like tasty bits of food. People like to gobble them up. (NCV)
18:21 Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose. (MSG)
20:19 A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much. (TNIV)
25:23 As surely as a north wind brings rain, so a gossiping tongue causes anger! (NLT)
26:20 Fire goes out without wood, and quarrels disappear when gossip stops. (NLT)

2. Take care of the poor
19:17 If you help the poor, you are lending to the LORD— and he will repay you! (NLT)
21:13 If you won’t help the poor, don’t expect to be heard when you cry out for help. (CEV)
21:26 Some people are always greedy for more, but the godly love to give (NLT)
22:9 The LORD blesses everyone who freely gives food to the poor. (CEV)
22:16 Whoever gets rich by mistreating the poor, and gives presents to the wealthy, will become poor. (NCV)
22:22-23 Don’t walk on the poor just because they’re poor, and don’t use your position to crush the weak, Because GOD will come to their defense; the life you took, he’ll take from you and give back to them (MSG)
28:27 Whoever gives to the poor will lack nothing, but those who close their eyes to poverty will be cursed. (NLT)
29:7 The godly care about the rights of the poor; the wicked don’t care at all. (NLT)
31:8-9 Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed.
9 Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice. (NLT)

3. Get family right
18:22 The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD. (NLT)
19:13-14 A foolish child is a father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like the constant dripping of a leaky roof. 14 Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the LORD. (TNIV)
21:9 It’s better to live alone in the corner of an attic than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home. (NLT)
21:19 It’s better to live alone in the desert than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife. (NLT)
27:15-16 A quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping on a rainy day. 16 Stopping her complaints is like trying to stop the wind or trying to hold something with greased hands. (NLT)
31:10-31 a godly woman

Disciplining Kids:
18:19 Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives. (NLT)
20:7 The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them.. (NLT)
22:6 Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it. (TNIV)
22:15 A youngster’s heart is filled with foolishness, but physical discipline will drive it far away. (NLT)
23:13-14 Don’t fail to discipline your children. They won’t die if you spank them. 14 Physical discipline may well save them from death. (NLT)
23:24 The father of a good child is very happy; parents who have wise children are glad because of them. (NCV)
29:15 To discipline a child produces wisdom, but a mother is disgraced by an undisciplined child. (NLT)
29:17 Discipline your children; you’ll be glad you did— they’ll turn out delightful to live with. (MSG)

Words to children:
19:26 Children who mistreat their father or chase away their mother are an embarrassment and a public disgrace. (NLT)
20:20 If you insult your father or mother, your light will be snuffed out in total darkness. (NLT)
23:22 Listen to your father, who gave you life, and do not forget your mother when she is old. (NCV)
23:25 Make your father and mother happy; give your mother a reason to be glad. (NCV)
28:7 Young people who obey the law are wise; those with wild friends bring shame to their parents. (NLT)

If you made it all the way through that, you deserve a laugh. Here is one of my favorite Proverbs (although I am not exactly sure what it means!):

Proverbs 30:33 Surely the churning of milk bringeth forth butter, and the wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood: so the forcing of wrath bringeth forth strife. (KJV)

Someday I’ll preach an entire series on that one!

In 36 days, 7 other guys and I leave for Haiti. We’re going to do our little part to try to make someone’s life better. We will be working on simple construction projects and taking supplies and funds to the hurting people in Port au Prince.

We are raising money to help fund these projects. We have committed $5,000 to build a prefab home for an elderly Pastor and family who have no place in which to live. We also plan to fund some minor projects that need to be done. Security walls need to be reconstructed, homes need to be built, churches need to be rebuilt. The need is major and I can’t imagine taking enough money to cover everything that needs to be accomplished. We can’t do it all, but we can all do something.

I am asking you for three things:

1. Would you consider making a donation? Just click here for detailed information about secure donations. I promise you, 100% of your donation will go directly to meet the needs of the poor people of Haiti.

2. Would you share this post with a friend; on your Twitter page, on your facebook wall or on your blog? You can just click on the links at the bottom of this post. Send a mass email if you have to. We need to get the word out in as many ways as possible. If you do not want to share my blog, please send your friends and family to Maranatha’s outreach website: wecanshareit.org.

3. Would you pray sincerely that this project will change the lives of people? I have no question that the lives of the team are going will be eternally impacted. We are praying that the Haitian people will see the love of God clearly demonstrated, that someone will find hope, that many will find Christ as a result of what you and I doing.

Thanks very much, I will keep you posted as the trip date gets closer.

Grace!

Rick

Through the years, I have come across more than one leader who was stranded on the side of the road, leg entangled in an ugly trap. They were hurt and bleeding and their leadership was sidelined.

I have listed a few of these traps and have given some advice about how to avoid them. Honestly, I have a few scars from being caught in a few of these snares. Maybe I can help you to go around some of these:

Pleasing people: Don’t ever believe that you can make people happy, that you are responsible for the fulfillment of others or that they can count on you to make life work for them. It’s not true and trying to do so will only destroy your effectiveness as a leader. It’s OK if everyone doesn’t like you. In fact, unless someone is currently ticked at you, you probably aren’t doing a very good job leading.

Answering to only one (other than God): All of us need to be accountable but we need to give account to a multiplicity of people. Submitting to any one person alone creates unhealthy dependences. Obviously, we all bow to the Father.

Messiah complex: Unless you can walk on water, you are not Jesus. You are not indispensable. Don’t forget it.

Special interest groups: People with an agenda tend to want to force that agenda on you. Don’t let it happen. Stay clear of manipulators who try to attach your name/reputation to their cause.

Tolerating disloyalty because of talent: If a person is not loyal to you, they will cause you more harm than good – end of story. It doesn’t matter if they have mad skills, they will submarine you and you will regret trusting them.

Not reading: Busy leaders have to make time to feed their minds. The least productive times in my life were the ones when I was too busy or too lazy to read. Keep a good book close by and read it.

Cynicism: Weary leaders often fall to the low level of cynic. Past defeats, let-downs and disappointments with people can bring about a skepticism that becomes cancerous to leaders. Stay fresh, take a break and keep your heart soft. Cynicism will destroy you.

Large donors: Don’t ever be under the control of large contributors. Once they have too much influence over you, they are driving and you are merely a passenger.

An undisciplined schedule: Empty spaces on the To Do List creates stagnation for leaders. Busyness for the sake of busyness is silly but a blank calendar is the devil‘s playground. Schedule productive activities.

Because I appreciate symmetry (and am a bit OCD) I can’t end on the number 9, so here’s one more:

Giving out more than you take in: Some leaders seem to have an endless supply of energy, enthusiasm and passion. Even these super-leaders have to take time to feed themselves. If you fail to do this, you will find yourself depleted and weak. Take the time to do something for yourself – those you lead will be glad, and you will be more effective.

Keep these things in mind. Stay out of the traps. Lead strong!

I am planning a long-anticipated trip to Port au Prince, Haiti from August 28-September 3. Just over six months ago, a devastating earthquake rocked the entire country and recovery is still in the foundational stages. With the help of a connection and friend there, a team of eight pastors (including J Simms, our Executive Pastor) will go to do hands-on ministry for one week. We don’t plan to preach or do pastor stuff. Our work will be manual labor. Since our construction skills are limited at best, I expect we will be digging foundations and carrying cement block.

Our church responded in amazing fashion immediately following the quake. We now hope to go the second mile and invest ourselves more deeply in helping Haiti.

In a few days, we will launch a fund-raising effort for this trip. Our tickets are paid for, so every penny that is donated will go directly to assist the Haitian people. We hope to take a good amount of supplies for those in need, along with money to help them with practical needs.

Will you be praying with me and listening for details on how you can get involved? I will have a lot more specifics later this week. Thanks so much.

Rick

Ok, these are the Proverbs that didn’t make the cut for today’s message. They are awesome in their own right. But since the good folks at Maranatha did not want to stay all day, I had to do some elimination.

Take a look and see what you think…

10:32 The lips of the godly speak helpful words, but the mouth of the wicked speaks perverse words.

11:1 The LORD detests the use of dishonest scales, but he delights in accurate weights.

11:17 Your kindness will reward you, but your cruelty will destroy you.

12:3 Wickedness never brings stability, but the godly have deep roots.

12:10 The godly care for their animals, but the wicked are always cruel.

12:18 Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.

12:19 Truthful words stand the test of time, but lies are soon exposed.

12:24 Work hard and become a leader; be lazy and become a slave.

12:25 Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up.

13:24 Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.

14:4 Without oxen a stable stays clean, but you need a strong ox for a large harvest.

14:15 Only simpletons believe everything they’re told! The prudent carefully consider their steps.

14:30 A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones.

Next Sunday will conclude Sage: Activating the Book of Proverbs. Join us!

I am pleasantly surprised by the response to our new teaching series – Sage: Activating the Book of Proverbs. Last week’s messages were very well received and there has been lots of dialogue since. I am not surprised that people recognize the need for wisdom; it is the enthusiasm that caught me off guard. Let’s roll with it!

Tomorrow, I plan to cover chapters 10-17 of Proverbs and do a compare/contrast presentation of wisdom vs. foolishness. We are excited about it. I hope that everyone within driving distance of Maranatha Church will come to one of our three services. Check out the details here.

One added feature of the series: We are including a daily “Proverb of the Day” on our facebook page. If you have yet to become a friend of Maranatha on facebook, do so today. And how about recommending us to a friend?

I’ve been called a lot of stuff in my life: “Ricky”, “little whit”, “#*@&*%!!!”.

When I was a little child, 3 or 4, my parents even saddled me with the endearing moniker, “Love” (I know, it’s amazing I am straight, right?).

I don’t care much how you refer to me but please don’t call me “Reverend”. This traditional term is one of respect. Men of the cloth – preachers – were considered as holy, set apart, closer to God than “normal” people. They were… well, revered.

I don’t buy that title for myself. I don’t like it and won’t be referred to by that title, if I can help it. I am not to be revered above anyone else. I don’t want to be separated from “normal” people. No pedestals please. The fall off is too painful. I believe in the priesthood of all believers which lets us know that one is not closer to God simply because he/she is in vocational ministry. I get a kick out of pastors on facebook and Twitter who include “Reverend” in their profile name.

A couple of fellow pastors call me “Bishop” because I have oversight responsibilities with some local churches in the area. I’m not crazy about it but it makes a little sense. I wish they would refrain from using it outside of a church setting.

I don’t like “preacher” very much. This is typically a Southern term but I get the feeling people use it when they can’t recall my name. I only preach for about 1.5 hours per week (three services). That is not who I am, it is part of what I do.

I don’t mind “Pastor” – that is my title and responsibility. But even that feels a little strange in some social settings. (You should see how people look at me when someone I know yells out “PASTOR!” to me in Starbucks).

Rick is better – that is what my brother decided to call me when he discovered that my parents had lost their minds and named me Wendell. Richard is my middle name.

As the old joke goes, “I really don’t care what you call me; just call me when dinner is ready.”

The end of it all: there is One who is revered, His name is Jesus. “To Him be glory both now and forever!” (2 Peter 3:18)

Grace, everyone.

“Rick” (aka “Love”)

I’ve been wearing this bracelet for almost eight weeks and no one, no one has even mentioned it. Nobody has asked me why I am wearing it or where it came from. I am not wearing it to get attention or to be noticed. But I am really surprised that, since I never wear bracelets, no one has noticed.

When trying to determine if we are or are not successful, we need to ask ourselves some evaluative questions. Defining a “win” may not be as easy as counting numbers or assessing the response of the crowd. I am not saying the questions listed below are THE 5 questions of success; they are only 5 among many. But I do believe these five are valid and worthy of our consideration.

Consider your last project or event, and ask these questions:

Is it bigger than you?
If what we are involved in does not surpass our immediate sphere of existence, it may not qualify as a success. There is something awesome about knowing that your influence ripples beyond what you can personally reach. Three and four tier impact is a huge thumbs up.

Will it outlast you?
This question causes us to dig a little. We are shooting for the longevity element. If your accomplishments die with you, claiming victory may be an overstatement. If years after you are in the ground your legacy still speaks, job well done.

Was there forward movement?
It won’t fly to say, “I occupied space successfully” or “I achieved my goal of surviving my career”. When your effort is concluded – is there progress?; has anything been achieved?; did it make a difference to anything or anyone? If not, you probably shouldn’t use the word “success” to label your activity.

Did it center on others?
Considering that one of the major purposes of our existence is to make the world a better place in which to live, any task that focuses on the needs of other people has to be at least considered as being a success. I realize that we have to take care of ourselves, but putting others first always ups the ante when it comes to considerations of true achievement.

Did it result in true peace of mind?
It is easy to console yourself when you fail and settle for a “it could have been worse” attitude. This is not success. True accomplishment of a goal results in inner peace and satisfaction that can’t be manufactured.

Bottom line is, I believe we have watered down the idea of success. Everyone is not a winner. Not everyone receives the gold medal. Let’s raise the standard once again of what true success actually means.

I got a call from a friend this afternoon. I was in the process of eliminating material from tomorrow’s message. I always have too much material and do last minute “cuts”. Some things the guy said caused me to want to pull back from my prep and change the scenery. So I went over to the beach and took a run and a quick swim.

The ocean was turquoise and the sky purple/blue, my polarized sunglasses helped with the effect. The clouds were sweeping on the horizon and it was a gorgeous day. While I ran, I was thanking God that I live in such a beautiful place. This is what came next:

If God can put this scene together, hold it together for thousands of years and preserve it for as long as He wants, don’t you think He can handle the rest of the details in your life?

I felt pretty small and insignificant. God doesn’t need me to run His universe. I can relax, do what He tells me to do and leave the results to Him. This is a refreshing reminder to me. God really is in control.

With that being said…

This Sunday, we are going to spin through the first 9 chapters of the Book of Proverbs. I fully believe that those who hear what is said and embrace the principles taught will experience positive life-change.

In the mean time, check out some good quotes on the theme of wisdom:

You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions. – Naguib Mahfouz
It requires wisdom to understand wisdom: the music is nothing if the audience is deaf. – Walter Lippmann
I do not think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday. – Abraham Lincoln
Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. –Plato
A wise person decides slowly but abides by these decisions.- Arthur Ashe
He that never changes his opinions, never corrects his mistakes, and will never be wiser on the morrow than he is today. – Tryon Edwards
We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future. – George Bernard Shaw
We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success. We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery. – Samuel Smiles
Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.-Albert Einstein
Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living; the other helps you make a life.-Sandra Carey

I hope you enjoy Sage.

Click here to take a look at pictures from the feeding center at Rio Bravo, Guatemala.

For a year and a half, our daughter Jessica and son-in-law, Josh have been involved in a life saving effort in Rio Bravo, Guatemala. Because of extreme poverty in the region, several children died of starvation. Thanks to the generosity of some and the hands-on involvement of others, the children are eating breakfast every day, and the situation is changing – slowly. Pastor Freddie who ministers in the area is providing facilities and volunteers to provide one meal a day for some of the kids. Other North American missionaries, Bob and Georgette, are busy implementing a fresh and clean water system, which addresses another major need in the area – the water is polluted and is poisoning the people there. Thank God, this situation is also turning – slowly.

On our visit there last week, our team was struck by the continuing need. Recent flooding has left many families homeless and with nowhere to turn. We are burdened about doing more for this hurting community.

I am now processing the possibility of a micro-economic project whereby the people there could learn to provide a more effective means of feeding the hungry there. While the efforts are awesome, the one meal a day that 200 of the most needy children are eating is not enough. Their families require food for additional meals. Our Missional Pastor, Rich and I are working through some ideas that would provide a greater supply of food at a minimal cost to North American donors.

I think it is possible to go there, train workers, establish a food purchasing/distribution system and secure funding that could save more lives. God help us to help those who cannot help themselves.

We just returned to the States with a team of eleven from a one week missions trip to Guatemala. We provided a camp experience for the children of Casa Shalom orphanage and ministered to the nutritional needs of the children of Rio Bravo. Our team carried in nearly 1000 pounds of new shoes and clothes for the kids.

While the trip was very successful, our flight to Central America was quite an adventure. We hit severe turbulence and got tossed around in the sky like a football. Due to bad weather, we could not land in Guatemala City but were diverted to El Salvador. After a few hours layover, we were able to get to our destination only to discover we had lost one piece of luggage. I am glad to say that things only improved once we arrived at Shalom.

As is always the case during these trips, we were overwhelmed by the needs of the children. There is abject poverty and hunger across the country. We were able to address some of the needs and we feel as though we accomplished our goals. There is a mountain of work that remains to be done.

Thanks to our team: Charlie, Amy, Colton, Andrew, Allie, Than, Megan, David and Allie as well as those who supported the trip through prayer and donations.

We didn’t do anything spectacular; there were no heroes on the trip. We didn’t play Jesus. All we did was walk through a door that God opened. You don’t have to go on a trip to help someone. We are surrounded by need. How do you plan to address those needs?

If you would like to see more pictures of the trip, I’ll try to post some in a day or so.

It’s good to be home.

God gives us just what we need. He did it again today. It was not a spectacular day for worship at Maranatha. It was one of those days when nothing really clicked very well. We kind of went through the motions. I preached the best I could but it seemed like no one was “into it”. Any church leader who is honest will admit that this happens more than we would like. So I wrapped up three services of preaching trying to focus on a positive take-away.

Then God did some pretty awesome things through His people AFTER church. Some 40 plus volunteers from Maranatha invaded Cabana Colony, a community near our church, with the goal in mind of serving those in need. Armed with lawn mowers, weed eaters and garbage bags, we fanned out over the neighborhood. 25 homes in the community were cleaned up, lawns mowed, trash cleaned…it was amazing! I can’t count the number of neighbors who came out to ask what was going on. A few got their gear and joined us. It was a blast!

Way more ministry happened outside of the building than inside today – just the way Jesus likes it!
People of all ages and entire families came out to serve. The volunteers made it happen – thanks so much guys! A special shout out to Alan and Sharon Seldow and Norm McDonald for their advance scouting and connections in the neighborhood!

The love of God was made obvious to some observers. Our DNA is showing. We are becoming more missional in our worship expressions and in life. I couldn’t be more pleased. I hope the same is true of God.

Tomorrow, I am bringing a message called Double Shot: Lessons from Elisha. I hope, if you are in the area, you will come by to worship with us. If you are out of town, feel free to join us online to hear the message – sorry, it won’t be posted until Monday. Details about our two locations and service times can be found by clicking here.

Grace, everyone!

As yesterday’s post indicated, I spoke last night at Salem Community Church, a Haitian/American faith family. Letha and I enjoyed a truly amazing experience.

I learned some things:

People who are familiar with suffering are passionate about worship: I was put to shame in regard to passionate worship. These people are serious about being in God’s presence and seeking for His help. When it came time for prayer, they were operating on a different level. I couldn’t help think that my need wasn’t as desperate as theirs. This is not a cultural consideration; they don’t pray with fervor because they are Haitian. They pray this way because they need God so badly. The things they have seen and experienced take them to a different place. I know little of that kind of desperation.

The Haitian/American community responds when you care. I felt a genuine connection with them when I told them that I am going to Port-au-Prince in August to serve earthquake victims. They trusted me and I found favor with them. The rest of the evening was impacted because of my announcement. They knew I cared.

Language barriers can be crossed. Several of the members do not speak English and I did not preach with an interpreter. When I read a scripture, it was projected on the screen in Creole. Still, many of the people greeted me personally in their language. There seemed to be no gap. They allowed us to feel at home among them.

I can preach for an hour, loudly, when necessary. I usually am good for about 35 minutes of preaching at Maranatha. I preach three services every Sunday, so many times, I am preserving my voice and I don’t get too animated. Last night, I was free to yell and sweat a little bit and I preached for a solid hour. It felt kind of nice – no one watched their watch, and no one seemed annoyed that I spoke so long. Don’t worry, Maranatha folks, I know better than to try this at home. I will reserve it for guest speaking appearances. 🙂

I am better prepared for my missions trip(s). I am leading a trip with a team of eleven to Guatemala on Monday. In August, I am leading 8 pastors to Haiti. My worship experience last night was part of the getting ready process.

Special thanks to Pastor Serge Jerome and the Salem Community Church people for their warm hospitality and graciousness. I am better because of my time with them.

I have the privilege of speaking at a local church this evening. Salem Community Church and their Pastor, Serge Jerome has invited me to be a guest speaker in their series of special services celebrating the completion of their new building. This faith family is comprised primarily of Haitian Americans. I am honored to be able to celebrate with them. Anyone in the Lake Worth area that would be interested in attending is welcomed to do so. The address is 3200 Roberts Lane, Lake Worth, FL, 33461. The service begins at 7:30.

Congratulations to Pastor Jerome and his congregation!

One of the consistently frustrating aspects of local church ministry is the inability we possess to help people who cry out for help but do not embrace the ministry of the church. Especially troubling are the people who call or email us asking for help but, they are not involved in the life of the church. I’m not speaking of people who do not know better. There are numerous people who have been around for years but never commit. It is nearly a daily occurrence for me or Letha to get a call… someone is in trouble, hurting, discouraged, afraid, confused; and we try to pray them through the issue they are facing. A vast majority of the time, these callers do not attend worship events regularly, if at all. Many times, the very issues that are troubling them have been addressed in a recent worship services, but they were not present to hear God’s Word and respond. It is painful to want to help but not be able to help.

A selfish part of me gets aggravated because these people expect my individual time when they don’t care enough to join the family. It is a one-sided relationship, in that, the church must be there for them but they are not there for the church. Then the practical side of me kicks in and I realize that if I spend all of my individual time with those who do not attend our services, I will have no time left for those who are part of the regular events. We are fully aware that we are called to reach out to the hurting and the marginalized. Believe me; our church is full of people like this.

It requires much patience in order to continue to offer help that is rejected. Then I am reminded how long it takes me to “get it” sometimes. God is patient with me.

At the end of the frustration is the realization that we are grace-based and will continue to try to help people; whoever needs it. There does come a time when we have to shoot straight with people and not coddle them – we refuse to use our resources to cater to people who remain uncommitted to Christ and His church. Sometimes, the best way to help them is to tell them to grow up and do the right thing. But we will never withhold help from desperate people.

My dad is 85. He has had a bad heart for 31 years, including 2 triple bypass surgeries. He was supposed to die in 1979 from heart failure. He worked for decades in a filthy machine shop, running dangerous machines. For all those years, he breathed the exhaust that spewed out, got drenched in oil and beat his hands to a pulp. He got up at 5:00 every day and worked in miserable conditions. I remember him coming home and he smelled like burned oil. He worked while sick and in every kind of weather. Because of his years of hard manual labor on outdated machines, he had the strongest grip of any man I had ever met.

I describe him as tough. He was tough because his family needed him to be. We have a lot to learn from his generation.

I don’t know how much longer my dad will be around. At 85, every day is a gift. But he is so tough, my brothers and I joke about how, one day, he will bury all of us.

So here is a happy Father’s Day wish for him.

I love you, Dad.